The Art of Leading on

In our lives we have been either led on or we have seen others lead on someone. To lead on someone is such a bad thing, according to the vast majority. It is bad as long as you are doing it consciously. Majority of the time it is done by people knowingly. But the rest, maybe it isn’t.

People who lead on others, knowingly, are far worse than scum. They toy with feelings of others. It is the cruellest of things to do. They date someone just for the limelight or just for hookups. They have friendships with people just as a means to an end. Sometimes we recognise such behaviour but sometimes we dont until it is too late. We blame ourselves for not seeing the signs and advices of our friends. But is blaming yourself the right thing ? Shouldn’t you feel happy that you came to know of thaf person’s true nature. At least they cant ruin your life more. The only way is moving on and hoping you meet someone better.

But sometimes people are led on unknowingly. One example that might explain it properly is a typical movie scene. The actress has gone through an emotional ordeal. As soon as she sees her husband and friend there, she hugs her friend first. You see the husband there standing in disbelief and shock. She feels safe with her friend than her husband. Most would agree that it was meant to be. But this is in a movie.

Real life isn’t as forgiving as reel life. Someone you consider your boyfriend/girlfriend isn’t really as close to you as he should be. In that moment we dont realise it. We just live in a fairy tale and often in denial. We would just brush it off by saying it is not that close a relationship as compared to your patner. We just say it. The world will see otherwise and say that there is something between them. Same applies for a friend or a bestie. Maybe you cant feel as safe around them as you should. Eventually you drop your patner/bestie or they drop you.

It is the next part that makes the whole thing a million times worse – GOSSIP. People gossip as if you have led people on. You are given a number of colourful terms. Sometimes it comes from your ex. Very rarely do the exs realise that it was an honest mistake and just dumb luck. Sometimes you may consider someone your world. They would too ordinarily. But in certain important times of their lives, they wouldn’t show you the level of importance you would expect. It will never be a single event but very often. It is always easier to blame someone than having to admit that it wasn’t meant to be.

Maybe you lead someone on without even realising that you are. Maybe we should just reflect once in our lives and trying seeing it from a third person perspective. It might just hold the truth we often refuse to see. 

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